The traces people leave behind

Wow, it’s been a long time since I have written anything on here. Returning home after living in another country for almost a year was a bit of an adjustment. The new job and studies have also been keeping me busy with little time for much else.

Also I tend not to write when things are going well. Which I suppose is weird, this blog was for me to share and journal my highs and lows.

Last Friday was a definite low. My uncle passed away at the age of 46. Young, if you think of all the medical marvels and technology at our disposal. I took his death harder than I thought I would. I’m doing the whole I’m strong and putting on a brave face bit but I’m still hurting. This is someone I grew up, a permanent fixture from my youth. He loved spending time with children, I think it’s because he never had any. I clearly remember one day after school he rounded up the neighbourhood children and we spent hours in the park collecting pine cones, leaves, anything that looked interesting to us. He then inspected our ‘treasures’ afterwards. I don’t why this memory is so vivid, maybe because of the look in his eyes was that of a young child, like all of us that day, ready to embark on an adventure.

I’m not going to lie, he was not perfect. He battled with drug addiction his whole life, he did not have an easy life and his living conditions near the end of his time was not great. Why I am grieving so deeply? Could it be that most of life he was not happy? He had his demons to fight, a fight we all have to face on our own. It almost seems like he had a wasted life, but I’m sure that he did experience joy and love no matter how brief or long it might have been.

All I know, the bad stuff, the things he did that disappointed and angered the family has diminished. What we left with are the memories of happier times. How a line from a movie can have us all laughing and thinking of him. Because no matter who or what he was he was loved. He will be remembered. He lives on.


Don’t forget to laugh

So my last post was leaning more towards tragically sad but it needed to be done. I had all these pent up emotions and writing about them makes me feel better. Today though I feel like I should instead remember the happier times of which there were many. These memories of my lost sister will always puts a smile on my face.

I remember when we were growing up we had to have the same of everything. Especially when it came to clothes, we loved dressing up as if we were twins separated at birth. Besides its way cuter when non-twins wear matching outfits.

Play time usually consisted of building tents. We would build tents so comfortable and snugly we felt no shame taking a well earned nap after all the hard work was done. After our naps it was back to our Barbies and Ken doll to play out elaborate stories that was much more entertaining than a whole season of Gossip Girl. P.S. Barbie and Ken sex scenes were way raunchier.

She loved horror movies however she was incapable of watching these flicks on her own, so she would always be recruiting some poor helpless soul to watch it with her. Now I’ve got nothing against watching a good horror even though this genre of film scares the pants off me (not a pretty picture) but she almost always fell asleep within the first half an hour just before all the good stuff happens. Leaving you all alone in the dark with another horror to go. Don’t even think of turning it off and going to bed she will wake up and complain but will be fast asleep again within five minutes. I’ve learnt the art of moving around stealthily.

Man could she eat. For someone with a fast metabolism this skinny chick could eat anyone under the table. If she wasn’t preparing food or eating food then she was talking about her next meal.  Not even being sick kept her appetite t bay. She was always ready to go. I would not go up against her in a food eating contest.

Then there was the farting. Yes you read that right. Anyone within a 10 metre radius was not allowed to fart near her lest any of the ‘particles’ settles on her and that would be a fate worse than death for transgressors. She of course was allowed a free pass on this rule and would be the first one the revel in the grossness of her farts.

A true fan of daytime television she could give you an in depth analysis of Judge Judy or The Ricki Lake Show. Such was her commitment to these cheesy shows that never mind a woman scorned – do not get in the way of woman, her remote control and her afternoon shows. Heads will roll. Just hope and pray she didn’t ask you to watch TV with her, she could be quite relentless.

She loved music and dancing and was a natural performer. Summers were spent rehearsing for variety shows and performing them for the family. When the Spice Girls hit the scene in the nineties it wasn’t hard to see that she would be Ginger Spice although years later she revised her choice to Posh Spice.

She was a second year cosmetology student before passing on and was truly gifted as a make-up artist. She had the ability to transform any girl into a princess and she had the patience to get it done perfectly. I ran when I saw her with tweezers though because she was always looking for an unsuspecting victim’s eyebrows to torment. I barely have eyebrows so not exactly sure what she was planning on plucking.

She was always full of ideas some were good, others were really bad. An unpopular recurring theme was when she decided she wanted to spring clean the whole house. I might as well have kissed my afternoon nap goodbye, actually i did because she does not understand the meaning of the word no.

There are too many awesome memories to recount and some of them can’t be shared on this lil ol blog as both our moms read this.