I was chatting to a close friend yesterday about marriage and was once again reminded how important it is not to morph into someone else in our relationships. I’m not referring to phase one, you know, those initial heady endorphin filled months of dating where we only showing our best side. I’m talking about when people give up their friends, hobbies and interests, the very things that made our partners fall for us. Why would we sacrifice such an important part of our identities? Isn’t the whole point of it all to be with someone who not only ‘gets’ us but who allows us to be ourselves. Accepting all our faults because none of us are perfect. The more we have to hide and suppress our true selves the more we end us resenting loved ones.
I know I made this mistake. I was too young, thought I knew it all and did not have the confidence that I now have. The great thing is that all these experiences and ‘mistakes’ are life lessons.